I’ve been an autism-mom for the last twenty-five + years. This definitely put a crimp in my career trajectory. So, my resume looks like swiss cheese with a huge bite out of it. Of course, there are a million things I’ve learned because of motherhood and this care-taking curve ball. And, although I was a third degree black belt in Aikido at the outset of this part of my life’s journey, my sense is that, after everything one goes through when your kid has an extreme disability, you either end up with your head in the toilet, on the ledge contemplating the plunge, or you embark on stand-up. Even though I’m always misplacing my magic cape, at this point, I’m about as invincible as anyone can get in an era of morphing virus vectors. So, I lean towards humor like I lean towards air.

If I could add my other life experiences—the turning points—to my resume, I’d say that they were more instructive than most jobs I have held or could have held. Certainly less la-dee-da. A couple of the biggies include: All my worldly possessions, including my home, were consumed by the 1991 wildfire in Oakland, California. A lawsuit related to a bad real estate deal after the Fire wiped out twenty years of savings. But, I learned a lot. And I got good at reading contracts.

I am so lucky to have been trained to become a sculptor at Boston University School of Fine Arts, and to have worked successfully as a studio artist and art teacher for many years. After the Fire, however, I somehow couldn’t get back into art in the same way.

My place of solace during these intervening decades has been writing. I’ve written one self-help book for women, over half a dozen screenplays, one teleplay, two novellas (Informed Consent and White Rain), several short stories, one stage play, two turtle doves and a partridge in a pear tree. I produced and directed a 13-episode web-series. And also edited many other people’s manuscripts, did some dialogue polish for a few manuscripts for potential novels and screenplays, and worked on the script for a documentary (Tibet’s Stolen Child), about the child political prisoner—Genden Choki Neima—successor to the Dalai Lama. For that effort, I earned a personal audience with His Holiness the Dalai Lama. Whew! High moment. My point: I’ve got some writing under my belt.

Prior to my son’s diagnosis of autism, I owned a boutique 3D animation business, making flying logos and videos that showed how things work. I did animation at a few other places and, prior to that, worked in an educational company (Logonet, Inc.) that focused on communication and how people build identities in pluralistic networks. <– I know… I know…mouthful. Philosophically, pluralistic means: relating to a system of thought that recognizes more than one ultimate principle. (Okay… okay… I’m a double Gemini. I dig this shit.)

In my last semester of college, my dad died unexpectedly. So, as soon as I graduated, I took a job working as a French-speaking flight attendant for American Airlines, so I could be with my mom as much as possible. My route was mostly to Haiti from New York City (The language of Haiti—Patois—is not exactly French, but close enough and a wonderful language.) and then flew between Canada and San Francisco. During this time, I took advantage of the opportunity to travel and made my way to Alaska, Hong Kong, Thailand, Singapore, South China, Japan, Indonesia (Bali), Australia, New Zealand, Switzerland, France, Belgium, England and Mexico. I’ve been to almost all the Caribbean islands and almost every city in the United States except New Orleans (still on my bucket list). As a result, I have a particular affection for Haiti and the Haitian people and am a huge fan of writer, Edwidge Dandicat.

I think it’s worth mentioning that I have been a life-long meditation practitioner. I once took a trip to India where I met my husband, Ed, in the Eat, Pray, Love ashram. Ed and I grew up less than thirty miles from me in the New York City. I grew up in Northern New Jersey.  So, my story about him is that I had to go to India to meet the boy nextdoor. Ed and I have now been married thirty years. Our son, Sam, is back living with us (during and since Covid) after attending Tom Todoroff Studio Acting Conservatory in New York City. Sam has overcome his diagnosis and is proceeding with his career passions which include singing, acting, and filmmaking. And now that he’s on his launching pad…I am finally putting my writing out there.

Anyway, as they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I think that the caveat to that is that if your sense of humor stays in tact, you’ve won the game.

writesallyrubin at gmail.com